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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in angeli85's LiveJournal:

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Wednesday, August 15th, 2007
3:19 pm
Sumhow, I'm still coming back here for some browsing...

Things changed alot... even this website outlook changed as well...

Hmmm... I got nothing much to talk here anymore... used to type non-stop here few years back... Like i said, things changed, feeling changed, mentally changed...

I'm no longer the good ol' E Li anymore...

I miss her tough decision making attitude... those were the things where i couldn't get back in me anymore... perhaps... Someday......

Current Mood: confused
Tuesday, August 1st, 2006
9:01 pm
This song plays in my mind again... Ya, its again... You loved me... You loved me...

Your the sweet dream

That soothes me when i cant fall asleep

Your the field in the middle of the city

Rushing by at the speed of light

Your the strong resolution when i find no peace

Your the chruch bells ringing in the evening

And all is quiet .. and where's my comfort ...

Its my heart its gets soo weak

( C h o r u s )

oHHHH ........ you love me ... loved me

Your the centre of my universe ... (my universe)

A thousand times i look around me and i find ...

oHHHH ........ you love me ... loved me

Your the centre of my universe ... (my universe)

A million ways could not explain you love me

( 2 n d V e r s e )

Your the soft words that touch me when i just cant speak

Your the praise from the ocean and the morning

Reminding me to keep the day

Your the flowers that i remember seeing eternally

Colours thru a golden hays

Prize and brave

Soft and frail

A new day's sun has made me see

( C h o r u s )

I understand there maybe grace

And there maybe pain

As im aware you blind the darkness

With who you are

Because ..

( C h o r u s )

That's it... Everything juz end here... Somehow, when i looked back our photos and think back our memories... it dun make me feel sad... but i juz smile off and move on... Thanks...


Current Mood: blank
Monday, July 17th, 2006
4:51 pm
What Love Means To You?
age: EtERNaL qUestionS oF LoVE..u must b one Of IT..

1.To My Friends Who Are - SINGLE
Love is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the
more it eludes you. But if you just let it fly, it
will come to you when you least expect it. Love can make
you happy but often it hurts, but love's only special
when you give it to someone who is really worth it. So
take your time and choose the best.

2.To My Friends Who Are - NOT SO SINGLE
Love isn't about becoming somebody else's "perfect
person." It's about finding someone who helps you
become the best person you can be.

Never say "I love you" if you don't care. Never talk
about feelings if they aren't there. Never touch a life if
you mean to break a heart. Never look in the eye
when all you do is lie. The cruelest thing a guy
can do to a girl is to let her fall in love when he
doesn't intend to catch her fall and it works both ways...

4.To My Friends Who Are - MARRIED
Love is not about "it's your fault", but "I'm sorry."
Not "where are you", but "I'm right here." Not "how
could you", but "I understand." Not "I wish you were",
but "I'm thankful you are."

5.To My Friends Who Are - ENGAGED
The true measure of compatibility is not the years
spent together but how good you are for each

6.To My Friends Who Are - HEARTBROKEN
Heartbreaks last as long as you want and cut as
deep as you allow them to go. The challenge is not how
to survive heartbreaks but to learn from them .

7.To My Friends Who Are - NAIVE
How to be in love: Fall but don't stumble, be
consistent but not too persistent, share and never be unfair,
understand and try not to demand, and get hurt but
never keep the pain.

8.To My Friends Who Are - POSSESSIVE
It breaks your heart to see the one you love happy
with someone else but it's more painful to know
that the one you love is unhappy with you.

9.To My Friends Who Are - AFRAID TO CONFESS
Love hurts when you break up with someone. It
hurts even more when someone breaks up with you. But
love hurts the most when the person you Love has
no idea how you feel. . .

10.To My Friends Who Are - STILL HOLDING ON
A sad thing about life is when you meet someone
and fall in love, only to find out in the end that it
was never meant to be and that you have wasted years on
someone who wasn't worth it. If he/she isn't worth
it now he's/She's not going to be worth it a year or
10 years from now. Let go . . .

My wish for you is a man/women whose love is
honest, strong, mature, never-changing, uplifting,
protective, encouraging, rewarding and unselfish.

YOU muz read tis... The one that is reading this, u know who u are...

Current Mood: hopeful
Saturday, June 17th, 2006
1:08 am
All about Virgo women...
She will be similar to LEo woman in appearance. A slim woman who walks with confident and proud. She has an egg shape facial structure, high and round forehead. She likes to look straight as if she is searching. She is not a pretentious type and will always say what she thinks.

You will see Virgo woman walks fast. She will try her best to be perfect, to look perfect and to feel perfect even tough there is no such perfection. She is very delicate of what and how she dress. She is bright and easily despair with obstacles. She like smart guy who will be compatible with her, so if you are a rich dumb guy, you can forget about her right now.

She is not a very possessive or jealous person for she expect respect from her love one. She does not like a part time lover, or a temporary mate. If she finds her dream man, she will not fo away. If she does not like you, she will keep a certain distant. Act proper and appropriate is her discipline.

She does not like and can not stand bad languages, cursing words or phrase. She likes a gentlemen who open the doors for her.She wants to feel protected and when a man taking care of her,she will feel like a complete woman.

She memorizes everything about other people and about herself very well. She can really keep secret, you can trust her on this. She likes a refreshing and a mild scent. She is very delicate in maintaining her beauty, so you could see sheis seriously picking soap which match and most suit her skin. Do not comments her on this picky habits, it is her happiness in working full times as a self beautifier.

She is not an innocent angel for sometimes she can be as tough as steel. Even she easily despair, she is not the type to cry over it. She is a shy type, so making speech in front of the room can make her nervous even when she walks and talks confidently.

She only search for true love, not just any love. Her love is an ideal one. She likes to think no one is neater and as effective as her, which can irritate you sometimes for there is no such thing. She likes sweet talk, but she can slip and say something unpredictable and unbearable to you too. When she stops getting mad,she will totally forget what she just said and be an angle again, if you have a date with her, you'd better be there on time.

Flowers and sweet word can calm her down. If you want to say sorry, make it brief and straight forward. Do not drag your apologetic words into a long making it up events, it could lead you to another world war. Sher likes her man to dress nice and clean She is good in details especially with money.Do not make she thinks that she is a clown or funny.

In the beginning of knowing her, please try not to glance at other pretty women so much. Early period of dating her, try not to hold her so much in public, it would not be a proper thing to do. She loves books, stage play and music and likes to criticixe about them too.

Criticism woman is her icon including big and small things in life starting from your hair, your dress, abd the way you talk. IF you are in love with her, be as almost perfect as you can.

Copied this statement from sumwhere... and i found it quite true... love it and gave me confidence... In sense of wat?? i dunno...

Current Mood: blah
Tuesday, June 13th, 2006
12:58 pm
flip thru my text book juz now... and i've found out a paper which i used to chit chat with my fren in class... tat was already 2 years ago... i was complaining that he never appreciate me... 2 yrs ago on his birthday, i made him cookies... bought him a shirt... and so on... rushed to his hse b4 his bday over, rite after work... but he juz never appreciate it... when i was leaving my hse, i gav him a call, saying tat i'm on the way to go over his place... he said tat he was having tea at mamak and he said tat he will be leaving soon b4 i reach his place... ok then, when i reached his hse, he's still not home yet... called him up, n he said he was still at the mamak and asked me to go and fetch him... by tat time, i was not really sure the road to tat mamak, ok then, i'll juz go and look for him... and i almost lost... and that place was so dark, but finally i get to find tat mamak... once he get into my car, the 1st question he asked, why i haven't take bath yet... tat was so hurt... never tot tat he will say tis... so disappointed... i've made so many things for him, but he oni said tat no need do so much things for him one... good... i still remember all those incident clearly... there are a lot more... as for last year, i never do him anything anymore... feel rejected and i'm not appreciated... so... for wat i do so many things...??? thank you for treating me this way... soon, i will find myself back, and do things for the people who knows how to appreciate me... thank u...

Current Mood: blank
Thursday, May 25th, 2006
10:23 pm
A weird habit, which is actually a bad habit of mine is... Hit people while watching comedy(movie) in the cinema... I can still remember how he hates it so much while we both were watching the movie Kung Fu Hustle... tat movie was damn fucking funny lar... but he hates it a lot coz i keep hitting him when i laugh until like hell... The next movie, tat i can even remember it till i die, the movie Pink Panther... he hates me too... coz i was laughing and laughing and laughing... but he hates it... and i dunno why... i'm basically juz being myself and laugh out loud... u know LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! he dun appreciate every moment while we both were together... he's juz dun appreciate it... he scolded me... screwed me up... saying that why am i laugh until like that??? i also dunno why... but wat has happened already past... so... juz let it be...

God will arrange everything... thanks God!!!

Current Mood: crazy
Friday, May 19th, 2006
5:02 am
early in the morning...
its so early in the morning... i can't fall asleep... and i'm so awake.. can anyone help me??? my class is at 10.30am later... after class assignments summore... how am i goin to survive???

Current Mood: moody
4:58 am
is there any song that can makes me cry?? i juz couldn't find... i know i wanted to cry... but i juz can't... why??? i can feel more better after i cry... i want to cry... and i dunno why... i got everything... love... frens... family... juz everything... but i couldn't get enuff of it... gimme more... and i'm so greedy... i am...

Current Mood: depressed
Thursday, May 18th, 2006
2:44 pm
Listening to the song 'Dearly Beloved', soundtrack of kingdom hearts 2... it makes me feel so down... everytime when i listen to tis song.. it makes my mood drop from 100'C to -negative... so sick... and so cold... yea, as they said, virgo are very emotional... its quite true... i'm emotional... i've realised it... wondering why... is it all becoz of humanity??? or personality??? wat am i saying here??? i'm lost... totally lost... Can anyone help me??? NO...!!! becoz i am the only one can help myself... right... i know u will say tat... hahaha...

Seems like he has found sumone right for him... I'm glad... Glad that he has made it... Congrats...

Current Mood: tired
Sunday, May 14th, 2006
8:23 pm
Clubbing again...
woww... its so tired today... so so so tired... but its worth of tired... Went Thai club again yesterday nite... and its oni 5 of us... but the musics are kinda sux la... dun really enjoy but its still ok ok la... hhmm... dunno lar... juz feel happy... becoz of... dunno... hehe... enuff for now...

Current Mood: bouncy
Friday, May 12th, 2006
1:36 pm
read her testi today... and suddenly i felt like i was once in her situation before... remind me of a lot things tat happened in the past... tat was hurt... but sumhow... anyhow... like wat he said to me before...

You're unhappy yet you needed him. You feel unlove but yet you love him.

Thats love... what you've experience now is love. Love is sweet, sour and spicy. It hurt but yet it brings you sweetness. It makes you angry and frustrated but yet it brings you peace and calmness

It all come as a package. Not everyone have the honor to feel what is love... You're one of the few lucky one. So.... enjoy this package of yours. How it may lead too.... its not too important. What's really important is to enjoy every moment of it.

Then life will be complete.

This is the one tat he told me before... and i remember it till now... and forever...
yea.... enjoy every moment of it... and yet, i'm enjoying till the max...

Current Mood: moody
Monday, May 8th, 2006
12:37 pm
So sick of love song...
what left behind us... are oni those memories... that we had been thru... i'm doin great rite now... i want happiness... and i want to sleep comfortably... Now, i'm really happy and enjoying my life till the max... Appreciate wat we have rite now... but no regret when he/she left... As long as u both were each other once before... And I know my decision is right...

Current Mood: blank
2:41 am
Me, myself and I!!!
This is me, myself and i... this is the way i am... forever will be... Dun worry, i won't change myself no matter of wat... once i've made the decision to be like tis... it will be forever like tis... Thanks for being there for me when i've gone crazy... Thanks for letting me being so irritating all the while even if u said tat i am not... but i know i am... Thanks...

Current Mood: silly
Thursday, May 4th, 2006
7:08 pm
Je suis désolé
Lo siento
Ik ben droevig
Sono spiacente

I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'forgive me'
I've heard it all before
And I can't take it anymore

You're not half the man you think you are
Save your words because you've gone too far
I've listened to your lies and all your stories (Listen to your stories)
You're not half the man you'd like to be
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'forgive me'
I've seen it all before
And I can't take it anymore

Don't explain yourself cause talk is cheap
There's more important things than hearing you speak
Mistake me cause I made it so convenient
Don't explain yourself, you'll never see
Forgive me...
(Sorry, sorry, sorry)
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'forgive me'
I've seen it all before
And I can't take it anymore

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
(Don't explain yourself cause talk is cheap)
I've heard it all before, And I can take care of myself
(There's more important things than hearing you speak)
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'forgive me'
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before

Current Mood: frustrated
Wednesday, May 3rd, 2006
7:00 pm
what a day....
today... i've realised that i've been talking to myself for so long already... few months back, i've been started saving messages in my handphone folder... tat was juz like a short diary for myself... started to save it during august last year... the 1st msg, saying tat how much i love him, and how good he is, bringing me here n there without any sound... but, the 2nd msg seems like a lil' bit emotional... which is saying tat happy things happen, sad things will be follow by the next... how know, it is true, when everytime i happy, sad things will be happen soon... slowly, i realised tat i've started to ignore him watever he said tat hurt me... ya, its true, i've ignore him... juz dun like the way he talked to me... tat was so harsh!!! and finally, i've deleted all the messages today while jeeng is doin her manicure... i read thru all tis msg becoz i was too boring sitting on the sofa... DAMN!!! i've been talking with myself for so long edi u know... every single day, becoz i got no one to talk to by tat time... everyone seems like so busy with their stuffs... and i choose to talk to myself and question myself and answer by myself too... till when things happen, everyone thinks tat it was so so so sudden... but for me, i've been thinking for so long already... do hope u guys will understand...

Current Mood: blah
2:20 am
i've learnt to be tough... independence... i've learnt lotsa things, after each relation ends... i know he needs me, but i couldn't be there for him anymore... sumone told me, if a vase was broken, either we can choose to stick it back or juz leave it... for me, i choose to juz leave it or juz keep the broken vase, it is becoz even if i stick the vase back in the same shape, there will still hav those broken line that could see... even if wat kind of glue we use, the lines are still there... even if we couldn't see the lines, but we can feel it... so, i rather keep the broken vase, and remember how nice it was the vase in the past...

that day, went yum cha wif whole bunch of them, suddenly edwin showed me his picture tat he took together with siew pink when they were in secondary school... both of them sitting on the wooden chair, i guess... secondary school table with books on the table i guess, if i'm not mistaken... tat pic was really so classic... and they both looked so naive... tat reminds me a lot of things which happen in secondary school... and he actually put tat pic in his mobile(he muz be missing those days very much)... by tat time, i was like 'oh my god'!!! tat was so sweet u know... then he asked me:'like tat not good meh'? then i was numb for a moment... ya, it is good, but its oni good for both of them... the feeling was like... ggggrrrrrr.... i dunno how to explain... tat was really really sweet... i get wat he asked... but i didn't say anything by tat time... and i choose not to say anything... juz remain silent...

and now, i'm no longer the 'event organiser' for tis bunch of frens anymore... they muz learn how to organise their stuffs by themselve but not me anymore... becoz i'm no longer with them anymore... i bet alton muz be missing me alot... hehehe... now oni he realise that actually i'm pretty becoz i chatted with him tat day, then he told me two things, he said tat actually i'm quite pretty... another thing is, he told me tat actually i'm a good gal... hahaha... so happy eh... ya i know i'm a good gal...i know... but if anyone of u guys saw tis journal, please do take good care of urself ya... oh ya, alton mark alexander, do remember i will alwez side u and support u ya... kekeke...

Thanks for u peeps to take time to read tis journal, which i felt tat tis journal is kinda long eh... Thank u for everyone who alwez rite beside me when i needed them... Alton mark, do u still remember we shared the nasi lemak at Darussalam??? Which we kena scolded by Dom tat nite... kekeke... Thank You... Love you guys so so much...

Current Mood: okay
Friday, April 28th, 2006
9:39 pm
I guess... my family has been expecting too much on me already... until me, myself can't even satisfy myself... becoz, i've expected too much on myself too... even to other people... i've expected too much on other people... everytime when i've done sumthing good, they will not take it as good, they will think tat its juz a normal thing for them... maybe its becoz i'm the only gal in tis family, i muz do the best for them... sumtimes i do really disappointed them... ya, i know... anyhow, i've already tried my best to do everything... in the other hand, i also expected to much on other people, for example, people who are dreaming on, i juz can't take it, its wasting time to dream on, becoz wat i've dreamt dun come into real life... tat's wat i think all the while, i only will set a target for myself, which is aim for the highest ones... even if i fall, i'm still falling in the sky... there are wind and clouds around me... i dun need to scared of anything... but people told me tat, things tat fall from the highest, its hurt till the max... but sumhow, i will juz let things be.. juz let it be watever it could be... i'm crapping around... crap goes on...

Current Mood: lazy
8:17 pm
Life goes on...
everything is like goin on smoothly... i'm enjoying my life till the max rite now... been pampered by everyone, everyday... i like the feeling so so much... hav been busy wif myself for the whole week... out for lunch wif frens... out for tea... chatting wif ying rite now... seems like she's having her own problem oso... damn sick when listen to frens problem but i couldn't help... i do really hope tat i can help... but me myself, already dunno how 2 settle my own problem, in the other hand, how am i goin to help my fren... how!!! teach me!!! she had been together wif him around 7 yrs... as i said, wat happen in between each couple, we, as a outsiders, dun really know wat is happening, can't even see... ya, its true, we couldn't wat happen in between both of them, i can only choose to listen to her, comfort her, and company her whenever she needs me... jing is away from me for days edi, wondering wat is she doin rite now... must be enjoying her trip in delhi... wat bout chiew??? wat is she doin rite now??? having dinner wif bf?? or doin her own stuffs rite now... wan chin??? having nite class??? ah mun??? working??? haha, her bday is coming...

Current Mood: relaxed
Sunday, April 23rd, 2006
11:30 pm
Dao Dai(Rewind)-Jolin Tsai
I had enough of what your so-called “arrangements”.
When will the “future” actually come?
You always wait until it’s too late to start telling me how cute I am.
I really want to rely on you but you were always not here.

I’m in a zone where I should be happy however you always give me nothing.
I’m along in the holidays and I can’t find someone to watch the ocean with me.
I’m always standing outside the door of happiness and I cannot find the way in.
I cannot let go of the continuous heartbreaks you gave me.

# I finally realized that I cannot get the love back, but it’s too late when you realized it
You told me everything at the end, and you cried to ask me to stay.
I finally realized that I cannot get the love back; there are too many obstacles in front of us.
But you don’t want to let me go, you’d rather be disgraced and ask me don’t leave you.

You always want me to be good and play our future slowly.
But my tears kept falling down my cheek.
How are you going to be responsible for the past, the trust that you should have given me?
I am slowly pushed towards the cliff by you.

From the whiteness on my face, I see the memories are slowly gone.
The past sweetness between us keeps rewinding but I can no longer feel anything.
And the hope that I had in you, is broken by you over and over again.
The trust has broken up into too many pieces, how are we going to mend the pieces together and start over again?

(Dao Dai) is a story about a girl who had given up hope on her boyfriend/partner. Although her boyfriend wants her back, the damage is too great that she thinks it’s no longer possible to love him.

Current Mood: disappointed
Saturday, April 22nd, 2006
10:24 pm
So long, Dominic... suddenly i feel so strange with ur name... so strange... its juz like a person who has no longer related to me anymore... All the while, i thought u are the one that will be leaving me first... how know, things changed... it's vice versa... i left first... juz felt so tired already... the feelings faded, and we are not as strong as last time anymore... I've learnt to be more mature and mature after each relation ends... U made me grow... u trained me to be independence... trained me to handle everything by myself... to worry bout myself and also you... But now, i juz can't take it anymore... its juz so tired to worry bout everything... i can't even take care of myself well... in another side, i need to take care of u also... and i really juz can't take it anymore... i think i'm really loved u... Take care ya... U need to grow without me... Think maturely... Glad that i was once ur girlfriend... i dun regret to be together with u... its juz tat we can't be together anymore... so, i need to leave by now... or else, u won't grow... do think carefully with wat i've said here... Hope tat u will see all these... Thanks for treated me so good... thanks for being understanding while i was so irritating... anyway, Thanks for everything that u have gave... Thanks and goodbye!!! I do really appreciate it a lot... a lot... i will alwez remember... I know we're cool!

Current Mood: thankful
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